Weather warning....

I am a weather nerd. Give me a storm or a tornado and I will stay glued to coverage like it’s the Super Bowl. I am friends with our local weatherman and if I’m not home I RECORD THE WEATHER FORECAST. Yes, I’m a complete meteorlogical goob. My dream gadget is a Davis Weather Machine thingy, but alas I now only have a Radio Shack weather radio to get my fix with.

I’m also one of those idiots that would love to chase a tornado.

The dumbass standing in the surf when a hurricane is coming? Me.

The girl who walks in the rain instead of running? <<<<

The person who has hurricane season highlighted on the calender? Me.

The person that slows down in front of you in traffic to take a picture of a cool looking cloud? Yea, that’s me too.

I have a whole folder on my iMac dedicated to the weather. I refuse to watch the Weather Channel because they started a feud with THE GREATEST METEOROLOGIST OF ALL TIME,James Spann. They are dead to me.

Here’s the thing though…I am a bad weather MAGNET !!

I was brought on by barometric pressure, I kid you not. I was about three weeks early because Hurricane Camille came ashore while my mom was pregnant and the subsequent drop in barometric pressure put her in labor.

When I was about 3 or 4 a freak snowstorm dropped a foot of snow at my house. In Houston, Texas.

I grew up in Singapore and went through many a monsoon.

I’ve been in a plane that was struck by lightning and went down to one engine. We had to make an emergency landing in the Phillipines with the foam and everything.

My parents used to have a condo on South Padre Island. Yea. Hurricane Barry.

One year while on Spring Break we left for Florida, and by the time we got there a late winter storm had unexpectedly rolled in and produced the lowest temps in Fort Walton Beach in 70 years !

I had front row tickets to see Def Leppard when I was in college…. the concert was canceled….wanna know why? Hurricane Florence.

In 2004 I was at my parents house the day before Thanksgiving. My mom got me out of bed 30 seconds before an F3 tornado tore our house in half and deposited my bed, my laptop and all of my clothes on an island across the lake from their house.

2005? I lived in South Mississippi. Hurricane Katrina anyone?

And now it is the week of my birth. Tropical Storm Ana just blew through, and Hurricane Bill (my dad’s name) is churning across the Atlantic towards Bermuda, where guess what?? My parents own property that was handed down from my grandparents.

No offense, but if the weather gets bad, you get the hell away from me.

You’ve been warned.


Cape Cod Kitty said...

Love the weather, too. I sit here today on the elbow of Cape Cod as we owait to feel the outer edges of Bill pass over us tomorrow. The dish trucks are here, etc...Fun. Bill has weakened but it comes at a time when Cape Cod is loaded with tourists, Obama is about to descend on Martha's Vineyard and all sorts of other events. I'm still hoping we see a bit of action!
My daughter has a home on the outer island of Eleuthera in the Bahamas and they see some wild weather, too. I bet their shores were pounded by the waves of Bill but they are not there right now.
Hope your Bermuda property is OK!

I love your blog and the way you write. You are inspirational to those of us grieving losses. Thank you.

Momza said...

THAT is Hilarious!
At least you're not in a trailer park.

T Lee said...

wow! that's all i can say!

oh! and freaky!, too.

Lynda said...

Suddenly, I'm glad we are on opposite sides of the states. :)

(Just kidding!)

HEATHER said...

You are hilarious! Keep us posted(even if it's just a sentence or two) to let us know you are OK.

Valerie said...

lol Funny!! I love James too. When he pulls off his blazer I know he means business!! I hope you have a great weekend!

LOVIN7 said...

HURRICANE COZZIE-I love it!! Have an awesome birthday celebration! ((HUGS))

Blondefabulous said...

Me too! I'm the moron outside with a camera trying to get good shots of the newly forming funnel cloud, or the lightning strikes, or the giant wall cloud.... you get the picture.

Yep. Me too.

So Not Wishy Washy said...

Classic stuff, I tell ya! I'm a weather freak too but not even close to your touches with Mother Nature.

I think the time of year I'm flinging myself to weather radar stuff with regularity is WINTER when we get told it's going to snow.

So. I have to hope for a snow day. Just one. One. Please?

(See? It's happening already.)

Mrs. Holly Hall said...

ooohhh enjoy the new look!

yeah. you are a bad weather magnent!

did you keep the laptop that was blown across the lake?


glad you were not thrown by the tornado!


namaste to you.


DutchBitch said...

Just as long as you don't drag hurricanes and shit with you whenever you come to Dutchyland I guess I'm cool..

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Honey, you are not alone. During hurricane season, I'm all over the National Hurricane Center's web site. Like hourly. I was on bedrest, pregnant with my twins, during Hurricane Katrina. When it storms here? I'm on the front porch, watching the clouds, tracking radar on my Mac.

I knew we were separated at birth! Knew it!